Custom Independence of the Aged People essay paper sample
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Since time immemorial, the responsibility of young people to take care of their aged relatives was known and accepted by everybody. The aged felt happy when provided with somebody to take care of them, or when cared for by their children or other relatives. With time, things have changed, and there is no old person, who is willing to be helped in one way or the other, even when it is apparent that he/she needs help.
This change has been associated with independence. As Hough (2010) asserts “More people are afraid of losing their independence in old age and being forced to move into a nursing home than they are of dying.” Old people view that being assisted in their old age is being a burden and dependent, so they want to be independent. They even prefer dying rather than being helped.
This has left us with the question, on whether we should help our aged relatives, or not. Even though old people do not want to be helped in fear of losing their independence, it is our responsibility to take care of them and hence, we should not hesitate to help them, regardless of their stands and position towards this idea. We should improvise means that will enable them see the need of being helped.
Even though aged people believe that dependence generates anger, shame, and defiance, as Span (2010) asserts, we should let them know that there is no independence without life. Will it be reasonable to see our old relatives die without offering any help in the name of leaving them independent? No, it will not be reasonable. We should be ensured that they are healthy, afford good meals, are well dressed; independence is of secondary importance.
The best independence that we can offer old people is not to take them to nursing homes and provide them with maids, who will help to dress, cook, and maintain the other duties that they will be unable to do. Otherwise, we should force them to accept the truth- they are old and need our help. According to Span (2010)“Tough and painful negotiations often ensue, and our own cultural and political history contributes to the tensions.” Hence, we should also review our culture and politics so as to ensure that they do not encourage independence but facilitated, mutual relationship.
Why do old people refuse to be helped?
It has been revealed by the latest research that old people are refusing any kind of help from their relatives. They prefer remaining at home rather than being taken to nursing homes. As a result, we have seen many aged people dying on their beds at home and this cannot be allowed. However, the motives that are forcing aged people to decline any kind of help, even when they need it, are unreasonable. This paper is, therefore, aimed at discussing the reasons that make old people refuse to be helped, even when it is obvious that they need help.
According to Span (2010), aged people have turned out to be stubborn, refusing any kind of help offered by their relatives. Their stubbornness can madden their families. For instance, sometimes people try to make their aged relatives’ lives more comfortable, offering to move them to a safer environment, or suggesting retrofitting their houses to make them more convenient. But very often the aged people take in this intervene as something unnecessary and insist that they are absolutely fine. Another example can be very familiar to many people. If our relative is losing weight, because he or she forgets to eat or cannot get to a market and cook easily, we usually want to take some measures to make their life more organized and fulfilled. But often we hear rejections of any help.
According to Hough (2010), the major reasons that have led aged people to refuse any kind of help from their relatives are the will to remain in control over their own lives, to be capable of doing things for themselves and carry out daily living tasks such as cooking, dressing and bathing independently. They view that getting old is not a reason to losse a choice control over the quality of their lives, or to move out of their own homes. Many aged people view that they just require help, ideas and advice in regard to simple equipments that exist to assist them with daily duties and to lead full, active and safe lives.
The idea of independence among people
The statement written by the anthropologist, Margaret Mead, is true. It is apparent that young people all over the world are not caring appropriately for their parents. Such an attitude towards each other was influenced by an American ideal of independence and autonomy.
There are many cases when young people, who have tried hard to help their old relatives, gave up and moved to another towns or countries. The aged people were left independent and many of them have lost the connection with their relatives forever.
Unfortunately, a lot of aged people usually say that they do not need any kind of help, even when it is obvious that they need an immediate help. Some of them refuse to move to nursing homes where they would be given a good care. They value independence more than life; many prefer to die independently than to live dependently. It is obvious that you cannot help somebody who is not willing to be helped. Hence, aged people should be educated on the significance of being helped and cared for. Only after they realize this significance and accept it, there will be a harmony between younger people and their aged relatives.
The aged people very often refuse to be offered any kind of help. They demand their independence, even if they are in a severe condition that needs immediate intervene. The reasons that lead the aged people to refuse help are baseless and can be easily prevented. Thus, we should by all means try to solve this problem. We should help our aged relatives without making them feel like burdens and care for them with love and patience.